For those who have time to burn.....here are my tales of cat vomit, culture shock American-style, faux pas involving large turds and lingerie (not in the same stories thankfully), Gynecology exams gone awry, and other misadventures.....all true (although at times, names have been changed to protect the not-so-innocent).

Followers

Friday, November 11, 2011

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet~


We are adopting.  A Furkid.  And that was the easy part.  Now the hard part. 
The Name.

Our cat that died last Spring was Minuit (Midnight in French).  He was from the French-speaking part of Belgium.  Our other cat---still with us---came from the Flemish part of Belgium.  Her Flemish name is Prutske (affectionate word for a child, someone you love, or a cute little one).  And now.......now we are adopting a cat from the deep South.  So he must have a name from the deep South.  What might that be?----Okra? Grits? Hush Puppy?  Chitterling?  No.  Southern food just doesn't translate to a good cat name. 

one day later:  Hmmmmm......Bible Belt?  Redneck?  Moonshine?.......No.  Still --nothing working.  

two days later:  How about some good ol' Southern names.....Billy Bob, Bubba, Jethro, ....no.  

three days later:  Deliverance?  NO!  

four days later:  Peanut, Peaches....nice Georgian names --but too cute.  This is not easy.  

five  days later......OK--finally---a good name that will represent our cat's Southern heritage.  Our new adopted furkid is............BANJO!  ......by the way---Banjo was in a cat show this weekend and he won first place in the OVERALL BEST HOUSEHOLD PET category.  (I obviously picked a winner)

The banjo is such a happy instrument--you can't play a sad song on the banjo - it always comes out so cheerful. -Steve Martin
Banjo looking so proud after his big win at the Cat Show in Atlanta
Showing off his cool-cat skills while being judged

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Critical instructions for visiting the Andersons in ARRR-CAN-SAW


Critical instructions for visiting the Andersons in ARRR-CAN-SAW~

1. Be sure to bring several pairs of pants with an elastic waist. These will provide you with countless hours of comfort after the many fabulous meals, snacks and desserts. 2. Save approximately 500-1000 dollars prior to your visit. This will be be needed to buy your new wardrobe after your visit (two sizes bigger than what you previously wore). 3. Before visiting take an assertiveness training class. This will enable you to say NO when faced with the endless conveyor belt of delicious, tempting dishes that will be presented to you every 45 minutes or so.  ‎4. You may consider bringing a dog (he will be of service when you need to slip half of your HUGE meal to him under the table). 5. Pack a good pair of running shoes and exercise clothes. You will need them so that you can work out in between feedings.     6. Fast for at least 3 months prior to visiting. This may or may not help. 7. Invest in a good stock so that you will have some funds saved for the lipo your hips and ass will need after the multitude of rich desserts you will be feasting on.

I sure wish I had had these tips prior to my visit.  But I didn't.

So now I am heading to Wal-Mart to buy some extra-extra-large elastic-waistband pants.   Several pair.

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