Actual conversation
United Airline Ticket Agent: That will be 200 dollars for your in-cabin cat.
Me: 200 dollars?!
Her: Yes. 200 dollars.
Me: 200 dollars?---Does my cat get a seat of his own?
Her: No
Me: An in-flight meal?
Her: No
Me: Bag of cat treats?
Her: No (with cold stare)
Me: How 'bout a packet of peanuts?
Her: (silence with cold stare)
Me: guess not.....
Flight Attendant (in thick French accent): Would you like chicken or pasta?
Translation: Would you like paper or plastic? (also in thick French accent)
10:30 PM (4:30 AM Belgian time): Go to bed.
11:19 PM: Wake up. (cat is on my back)
12:50 AM: Wake up again. (cat is laying on my arm, staring at me)
1:24 AM Wake up ....again (cat is massaging my hair)
2:05 AM: Wake up .........again. (cat is trying to burrow under my blanket)
3:30 AM: Wake up. Time to get up to get ready for work! (did I even sleep?)
4:30 AM: Leave for work. (are you kidding me?)
4:55 AM: Arrive at bus stop and board bus.
6:00 AM Arrive at Pentagon and get on second bus.
6:15 AM: Arrive at Navy Yard and wait for shuttle bus.
6:46 AM: Conclude that I missed the shuttle bus. Wait for next one.
7:15 AM: Conclude that I must not be standing in the right spot. Spend next half hour asking bus drivers, pedestrians, and street people about shuttle. Discover nobody knows anything. (or is it.... everybody knows nothing?)
7:52 AM: Homeless woman asks "are you ok?" (you know it's bad when the homeless people are concerned and are consoling you)
8:15 AM: Someone at work finally answers phone.
8:45 AM: Picked up by someone from office.
9:00 AM: Arrive at work.
9:01 AM: Wishing I were back in Belgium.
Day 2-4
It certainly didn't help that I had not slept more than 4 hours a night during the two weeks prior to the move....and then had jet lag on top of that. So after flying in on Sunday and then starting work Monday...that first week of getting up at 3:30 AM for work every day was brutal. My brain was numb and I was barely functioning. I washed my face with conditioner in the shower, stubbed my toe (hard) on a chair at work I apparently didn't notice, one morning I put masquera on only one eye, fell asleep at my desk (in my cubicle---where everyone can see me), couldn't do basic math in my head (and mis-figured a critical calculation), and wore my stockings inside out on day two. It was a week of a comedy of errors.
Update: Week 2
My spiked high heel got caught in the grate at the bus stop yesterday while I was waiting for the bus. So as everyone stood around watching, I not-so-casually stepped out of my shoe and had to squat down and work it back out of the grate--it took me 5 minutes. (and I did hear people snickering) Oh, and my toenail got caught on the carpet tonight and half of it was ripped off... and I am still so tired that today I was contemplating the possibility of getting my eyelashes weaved up into my eyebrows -- at least I could then keep my eyes open.
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