Life in the deep South---I am trying to adjust. Really.

I now live in the deep South (aka JAW-JA, which may not officially qualify as the deep South---but it's close enough)--- where everyone drinks their iced tea with a cup of sugar, where they make up new words --like "wunst" (as in wunst I drank an entire jug of sweet tea), where Waffle Houses are on every corner (and the waffles are really pancake batter cooked in a waffle iron), where it's so hot outside that I have debated throwing a roast, a few carrots and potatoes on my backseat so that by the time I get out of work, dinner is ready (because my car really is an oven), where they sell a product called "baconnaise"....a bacon-flavored spread (because--as the label proclaims--"everything should taste like bacon!"), where the shopping malls have "brow stands" so that women can sit in a chair and have their brows, and more importantly, their chin hairs pruned and plucked (out in the middle of the mall for all to admire....like a sick little hair tweezing circus side-show), where Southern slang and twang is sometimes hard to grasp (and where what you don't know can hurt you), and where some neighborhoods make you start humming that banjo tune from Deliverance....

that bearded lady you saw in the circus..... apparently she retired in Poland.

(although this photo was taken in Poland.... she looks like she could use a good Southern style chin-hair-plucking....in the middle of the mall of course)