Questions ???

In spite of having lived overseas for so long and traveling all over,
I find the world increasingly perplexing. For example,

Why do hotel maids fold the toilet paper into that little point? I don't particularly want
to use toilet paper that has been fondled by some unknown person into some strange
tissue origami.

Why do we have to pay for ketchup at McDonald's in Europe? Is ketchup
such a rare and expensive commodity here that the tablespoon of
tomato sauce in that little packet must be accounted for?

Why is it that there is a direct correlation between how old we get
and how many pairs of clippers we own? The more we age the more we
seem to accumulate fingernail clippers, toenail clippers, hedge
clippers, nose hair clippers, etc. (P.S. In case you are wondering, I don't own any nose
hair clippers)

Why do they call it "French dressing"? I've been to France numerous
times and had many salads there and I have never been offered that
strange neon orange dressing. (What's it made of anyway?….carrots on steroids?)

Why do airlines even bother with the little peanut packets? What are
5 peanuts supposed to do for me? I feel so frustrated and even more
hungry after I eat them that I am ready to chew off my own arm.

Why haven't I seen these products yet?---"Backhair Be-Gone" (like Nair
for the back), or "Panties-in-a-Can" (spray on when wearing those
super tight fitting jeans), "Butt-deflectors" (special pants with
strategically placed mirrors sewn on the hips to make the appearance
of your butt smaller), "O-So-Soft Fuzzy hats and gloves" (Made out of
dryer lint---there ought to be a use for that stuff!) or my favorite,
"Make-a-Toupee Home Craft kit" (save your armpit and leg hairs after shaving and weave
them into a completely natural and real looking toupee!)

Well, enough of this nonsense…I need to get back the really important question of
today---who is going to unpack the last few boxes that I never seem to have time to get
to?! (Afterall, I am the Queen of Procrastination)